Grade 3 English

By Alexis Burling
November 4, 2009

Grandchildren learn to get more out of the books they read, and begin to master the mechanics of writing

By third grade, students focus almost exclusively on reading to learn. Teachers help third-grade readers zero in on the main ideas and supporting details of paragraphs, and children learn how to use chapter headings, tables of contents, and indexes. When reading fiction, third-graders begin to make predictions and inferences, and to think about characters’ motivations. Teachers show students how to use small charts known as “graphic organizers” to help track the main ideas, characters, and themes in their reading. In writing lessons, teachers concentrate on the mechanics: grammar, spelling, and handwriting. Students are evaluated based on how they write (including proper sentence structure and correct use of the parts of speech) and on what they write (including well-organized thoughts, descriptive language, and clear dialogue). Teachers also expect students to stay on their main point throughout a piece of writing, which is often a challenge for very young writers. To practice these skills, third-graders will create outlines to write stories that have a beginning, a middle, and an end, and they will be asked to edit and correct their own work. As part of their daily homework, third-graders study weekly spelling and vocabulary lists, and keep a record of their personal reading selections.

Teaching to the Test? Since the federal No Child Left Behind Act became law in 2002, schools have put increased emphasis on standardized tests, especially in English and math, and teachers have sometimes feel pressured to forgo “outside the box” methods in favor of preparing their students for the high-stakes, end-of-the-year tests. English teachers have noted that many of these tests are featuring more easier-to-grade multiple-choice questions and fewer short-answer essay questions. Critics say this shift has been detrimental for kids who are better at expressing what they have learned in writing than at answering a question with only one right answer. They also complain that focusing on the test, and the kind of questions it asks, pigeonholes young students into a single, rigid way of learning.

* The 20th Century Children’s Poetry Treasury (Knopf, 1999) was compiled by the country’s first Children’s Poet Laureate, Jack Prelutsky, and contains 211 poems from 137 writers, including Langston Hughes, Ogden Nash, and Karla Kuskin. This exhaustive anthology will introduce grandchildren to many types of poetry.
* Stone Soup magazine offers 48 pages of stories, poems, book reviews, and artwork, all created by kids for kids. Inspire your grandchildren to strive for publication at an early age by sharing this one-of-a-kind publication with them.
* Reading a 500-page novel may seem too daunting for some third-graders, not to mention plenty of time-challenged adults. But Caldecott Award winner Brian Selznick’s The Invention of Hugo Cabret, (Scholastic, 2007) an engrossing mystery set in 1930s Paris, contains enough full-page charcoal drawings to make the task manageable for ambitious, advanced students.
* Third-graders become comfortable using a thesaurus to help them find just the right word for their writing assignments. Joshua Kendall’s The Man Who Made Lists (Putnam, 2008) is a historian’s glimpse into the life of Peter Mark Roget, the man who created the famous thesaurus that still bears his name. Kendall’s book is for adults, but grandchildren fascinated by words will be eager to hear what you learn from it.

For Young Puzzlers. Wordsmiths young and old love a good crossword challenge. Doing a crossword together on the couch or at the park is a great way to bond with grandchildren, and a great way to build their vocabulary. There are plenty of crossword anthologies for young people on bookstore shelves, but you can make a special crossword puzzle for them, or create one with them, at a free website like this one.

It’s Okay to Act Out. “Reader’s Theater,” in which students act out short plays in their classrooms, is a popular elementary-school activity. But now that your grandchildren are a little older, and doing more writing in school, they may be ready to write a short play of their own. It could be about your family, a vacation memory, a favorite athlete, or a comic-book hero. Help the kids assemble costumes from clothes around the house, do a couple of rehearsals, then put on a show for family and friends.

Thank You So Much. Appreciation goes a long way, especially where gifts are concerned. Teach your grandchildren the importance of gratitude and proper etiquette, and help them boost their writing skills, by having them write thank-you notes after their birthdays. Before the kids start writing, take a trip to a card shop so they can choose their own stationery and pens.

Editor’s Note: Alexis Burling is a freelance book reviewer and writer in Brooklyn, N.Y. She also edits and writes for Storyworks, a classroom language-arts magazine published by Scholastic.

We would like to know what you think? dan@youngchronicle.com

Source: Grandparants

 

Kids Watch too much TV

By Matea Gold
October 29, 2009

More than an entire day — that’s how long children sit in front of the television in an average week, according to new findings released Monday by Nielsen.

The amount of television usage by children reached an eight-year high, with kids ages 2 to 5 watching the screen for more than 32 hours a week on average and those ages 6 to 11 watching more than 28 hours. The analysis, based on the fourth quarter of 2008, measured children’s consumption of live and recorded TV, as well as VCR and game console usage.

“They’re using all the technology available in their households,” said Patricia McDonough, Nielsen’s senior vice president of insights, analysis and policy. “They’re using the DVD, they’re on the Internet. They’re not giving up any media — they’re just picking up more.”

The increase in consumption is in part the result of more programming targeted at kids, she said, including video on demand, which is particularly popular among young children who like to watch their favorite shows over and over again.

“When I was a kid, I had Saturday morning cartoons,” McDonough said. “And now there are programs they want to watch available to them whenever they want to watch them.”

The findings alarmed children’s health advocates, who warned that increased television watching is linked to delayed language skills and obesity. A 2007 study by researchers at the University of Washington found that babies who watched videos geared to them learned fewer vocabulary words than infants who never watched the videos.

When kids are plunked in front of a screen, they’re also missing out on critical opportunities to learn from their parents and develop imaginative play, experts said.

“I think parents are clueless about how much media their kids are using and what they’re watching,” said Dr. Vic Strasburger, a professor of pediatrics at the University of New Mexico School of Medicine and a spokesman for the American Academy of Pediatrics.

“The biggest misconception is that it’s harmless entertainment,” said Strasburger, who has written extensively about the effects of media on children. “Media are one of the most powerful teachers of children that we know of. When we in this society do a bad job of educating kids about sex and drugs, the media pick up the slack.”

The academy recommends no screen time for children younger than 2 and less than an hour or two for those older than 2.

“There are some extraordinarily good media for kids,” he said. “But even the best — ‘Sesame Street’ for 5-year-olds — kids shouldn’t be watching five hours a day. They should be outside playing. They should be having books read to them.”

The new data from Nielsen comes on the heels of the news that the Walt Disney Co. expanded its refund offer for its “Baby Einstein” videos after pressure from the Campaign for a Commercial-Free Childhood, which complained to the Federal Trade Commission about claims that the videos are educational. On Monday, Susan McLain, general manager of the Baby Einstein Company, issued a statement saying the company does not make such claims and that the refund offer is not an admission that the company misled parents in its marketing.

Susan Linn, director of the Campaign for a Commercial-Free Childhood, said the way infants are exposed to media shapes their future relationship with television.

“Once you start hooking babies on media, it’s harder to limit it,” she said. “If we start children early in life on a steady diet of screen time and electronic toys, they don’t develop the resources to generate their own amusement, so they become dependent on screens.”

Networks that program specifically for children discounted the potential negative effects from the report’s findings.

“Our programming for 2- to 5-year-olds is totally educational programming, and has been widely praised by advocates, widely praised by educators,” said Dan Martinsen, a spokesman for Nickelodeon, the network behind such popular kids’ shows as “Dora the Explorer,” “Wonder Pets,” and “Blue’s Clues.”

Kids ages 2 to 5 spent an average of 3 hours and 47 minutes a day watching television in the fourth quarter of 2008, up from 3 hours and 40 minutes in the fourth quarter of 2007, according to Nielsen. Older children watched an average of 3 hours and 20 minutes a day, up from 3 hours and 17 minutes.

In 2008, children spent 97% of their screen time watching live TV, although those ages 2 to 5 are increasingly watching shows through digital video recorders or DVDs. Younger kids also watch more commercials in playback mode, viewing 50% of ads, compared with the 44% watched by children ages 6 to 11. The data is based on Nielsen’s national sample, which includes 6,700 kids ages 2 to 11.

 

Editor’s Note : You can contact her at matea.gold@latimes.com. Times staff writer Dawn C. Chmielewski contributed to this report.

We would like to know what you think. dan@youngchronicle.com

Copyright © 2009,

 

Source: The Los Angeles Times

Grade 2 Social Studies

By Audra Wallace
October 28, 2009

Grandchildren tour the U.S., its geography, and its government, while learning to be good citizens

The second-grade social studies curriculum continues the theme of community. Students extend their study beyond their families, schools, and neighborhoods to include their state and country. They learn about their immigrant ancestors’ journeys to the United States, and the cultures that they left behind. In geography lessons, students learn the names and locations of the 50 states, find oceans and continents on a map and a globe, and use map symbols to understand the geography of their town, state, and country. Second-grade social-studies textbooks emphasize landforms, such as mountains, plains, and plateaus, and the different climates people experience across the country. Students compare and contrast life in urban, suburban, and rural communities, and learn how people in various communities use natural resources. Later in the year, the focus shifts to the U.S. Constitution and government. Second-graders learn how the country’s leaders, lawmakers, and judges work together to protect individual rights and promote the common good. Teachers discuss the characteristics and responsibilities of citizenship throughout the year, and several classroom activities center on understanding rules, taking responsibility, and resolving conflicts peacefully. Your grandchildren will develop an understanding of how citizens must make choices about their laws when they vote, and why voting is an important component of the U.S. government.

Warming Trend. Global warming is a critical issue in both science and social studies classrooms. As science teachers discuss the ways global warming may be affecting Earth’s environment, social studies teachers will examine the tradeoffs and hard decisions that citizens and political leaders must make to address the problem.

* Second-graders are reading more on their own, but they are still young and enjoy a good read-aloud. Share with your grandchildren books with social-studies themes, like Patricia Maclachlan’s All the Places to Love (Joanna Cotler, 1994), Susanna Davidson’s The Town Mouse and the Country Mouse (Usborne, 2007), and David Catrow’s We the Kids: The Preamble to the Constitution of the United States (Puffin, 2005).

* Benjamin Franklin will lead you and your grandchildren on a tour of the U.S. government, its workings, and its history, at Ben’s Guide, the federal government’s social-studies website for young children.

Red, White, and Blue Food. Grandchildren can learn about social studies well beyond the walls of the classroom — in your kitchen. Don an apron and let children help you make patriotic or historic recipes from Joan D’Amico and Karen Eich Drummond’s The United States Cookbook: Fabulous Foods and Fascinating Facts From All 50 States (Wiley, 2000) or The U.S. History Cookbook: Delicious Recipes and Exciting Events from the Past (Wiley, 2003)

Tackling Quarter Backs. The U.S. Mint has almost completed its unveiling of commemorative quarters representing each state. Work with your grandchildren to collect a complete set of the quarters. Which do your grandchildren like best? Which images offer the most information about their states? What kind of alternative design would they suggest for their home-state’s quarter? Can they place every quarter on a map of the U.S.?

 

Editor’s Note: audra Wallace is a former elementary school teacher. She currently works as an associate editor for Scholastic’s classroom magazines..

We would like to know what you think? dan@youngchronicle.com

Source: Grandparants

 

Know About Adoption

By Laura Broadwell
Oct. 20, 2009 

Adopting a child is a wonderful, life-changing experience. But if you’ve always dreamed of having a traditional pregnancy, birth, and family life, there are a few things you should consider before you adopt.

 

You may need to look for a “baby basics” class. Most women who give birth learn about the care, feeding, and basic development of babies in their childbirth class or at a class for expectant parents. If you’re adopting a baby, however, this particular option won’t be available to you. Fortunately, though, some hospitals, adoption agencies, and adoption-support groups now offer infant care and parenting classes to adoptive moms and dads. Ask your agency, local hospital, local chapter of Resolve, or other parent-support group for information.

 

You may not be able to breastfeed. Some adoptive mothers have been able to breastfeed their infants, by stimulating their breasts to produce milk. (Some take hormones, such as prolactin and oxytocin; others use more natural methods.) Not every adoptive mom will be able to do this, however. And even those who do breastfeed will still need to supplement their baby’s diet with formula, since they won’t be able to produce enough milk to meet their infant’s nutritional needs. If you think you’ll want to breastfeed, learn as much as you can before your baby arrives. Contact a lactation consultant at a local hospital or a representative from La Leche League (www.lalecheleague.org), or read a book on the topic, such as Breastfeeding the Adopted Baby by Debra Stewart Peterson.

 

You may not have a baby shower until months after your baby is born. Since the adoption process is often filled with so much uncertainty, many prospective parents prefer to wait until after their baby is home before having a shower. Often, this is a practical course of action. For instance, if a family is adopting from overseas, they may not know their child’s gender, size, or age until shortly before traveling to get him. (In some cases, their “baby” may be 15 or 16 months old!) However, once parents are home and settled into a routine, they’ll have a better sense of what they need — and of their baby’s likes and dislikes.

 

You won’t be sending out traditional “birth” announcements. Of course that’s not to say that you won’t be announcing your child’s adoption in a special way. Some parents send out handwritten cards or notes, detailing some of the highlights of their child’s adoption (such as where he was born, his birth name, his family name, the date he was born, the date he was adopted, etc.). Others order special adoption announcements, which they personalize with facts about their family. Whichever method you choose, be sure to include a photo of your child and his new family members.

 

Your “baby book” may not begin at birth. If you’re planning to be at your child’s birth or to adopt her as a newborn, then you’ll be fortunate enough to have some very early photos of your baby. In this case, your baby book may also include pictures of your child’s birth mother and possibly her birth father. But if you’re adopting an older baby, or perhaps an older child, you may not have access to many early baby pictures. (For instance, if you’re adopting a child from overseas, you may have only the referral photo you were sent, and possibly one or two others.) On the other hand, your child’s baby book will probably include lots of pictures from the day you adopted her and/or the day you brought her home and of the people who cared for her in a foster family or orphanage.

 

Your child may celebrate two special days. Often adoptive families celebrate not only their child’s birthday but also the day he was adopted. (Sometimes this is called “Adoption Day,” “Family Day,” or “Gotcha Day.”) Whether or not you choose to do something special for Adoption Day is up to you. But some families have a small celebration at home and perhaps look at pictures or a video from the day their child was adopted. Other families get together with their “travel group” (families with whom they traveled to the host country and who adopted on the same day), and have a larger celebration, honoring all their kids.

 

You’ll probably be asked lots of personal questions. Friends, relatives, coworkers, and even people on the street may ask questions about your adoption, particularly if you’ve adopted from overseas and your child doesn’t look like you. Many of the questions or comments are probably well intentioned, but they may seem rude or too personal, especially when asked in front of an older child. (Adoptive parents have been asked, for instance, “How much did you pay for your baby?” “How could the birth mother ‘give away’ such an adorable child?” “Do you know anything about your child’s ‘real’ family?” etc.)

When asked a question that feels too personal or improper, you have the right not to answer it — particularly if it compromises your child’s, the birth mother’s, or your own privacy. But sometimes you can find a way to respond to a question that’s in the best interest of your family and offers some important information about adoption. For instance, when asked “How much did you pay for your baby?” you can explain that the fees you paid your agency and/or orphanage (you don’t have to disclose the amount) went toward the facilitation of your adoption and to the early care of your child. In a sense, they’re similar to what a pregnant woman pays to her doctor and hospital, you can add.

 

You won’t remember a time when your child didn’t live with you. Being a parent is one of the most enriching experiences in life. And though the job is often all-consuming and demanding, it certainly can expand your capacity for love and fun in ways you never imagined. That’s why most parents (adoptive or otherwise) can barely remember a time when their child wasn’t with them — and, for many parents, all the hard work it took to adopt fades into a distant memory.

 

 

Editor’s Note: The Complete Adoption Book (Second Edition) by Laura Beauvais-Godwin and Raymond Godwin, Esq.; The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Adoption by Chris Adamec

All content here, including advice from doctors and other health professionals, should be considered as opinion only. Always seek the direct advice of your own doctor in connection with any questions or issues you may have regarding your own health or the health of others.

We would like to know what you think. dan@youngchronicle.com

 

Source: Parents

Make Halloween Safer

By Dan Samaria
Publisher/GCC
Oct 21, 2009

Editor’s Note: We at the Chronicle joins forces with The National Center for Missing & Exploited Children. To help Parents protect their children during this years Halloween.

We also are proud to join forces since 1990 to find missing kids across America. You can see their photos on the front of our sight.

Below are some safety tips to use for this Halloween.

We would like to know what you think. dan@youngchronicle.com

 

Halloween is one of the most exciting times of the year for children, but sometimes the most hectic for parents. Nearly 94 percent of children between the ages of four and twelve participate in Halloween activities each year. The National Center for Missing & Exploited Children (NCMEC) reminds parents to take a moment to consider basic safety precautions that will make Halloween a safer night of fun.

 

• CHOOSE bright, flame-retardant costumes or add reflective tape to costumes and candy bags so children are easily seen in the dark. In addition, carry a glow stick or flashlight.

 

• PLAN a trick-or-treating route in familiar neighborhoods with well-lit streets. Avoid unfamiliar neighborhoods, streets that are isolated, or homes that are poorly lit inside or outside.

 

• NEVER send young children out alone. They should always be accompanied by a parent or another trusted adult. Older children should always travel in groups.

 

• ALWAYS walk younger children to the door to receive treats and don’t let children enter a home unless you are with them.

 

• BE SURE children do not approach any vehicle, occupied or not, unless you are with them.

 

• DISCUSS basic pedestrian safety rules that children should use when walking to and from houses.

 

• CONSIDER organizing a home or community party as an alternative to “trick-or-treating.”

 

• MAKE sure children know their home phone number and address in case you get separated. Teach children how to call 911 in an emergency.

 

• TEACH children to say “NO!” or this is not my mother/father” in a loud voice if someone tries to get them to go somewhere, accept anything other than a treat, or leave with them. And teach them that they should make every effort to get away by kicking, screaming and resisting.

 

• REMIND children to remain alert and report suspicious incidents to parents and/or law enforcement.

 

“Child safety is important year round, but Halloween is an especially important time for parents and children to pay extra attention to their surroundings and not let their guard down,” says Nancy McBride, National Safety Director of NCMEC. “It is important that parents exercise a few basic safety precautions to help ensure that Halloween is both fun and safe.”

To download pdf of safety tips

 

Source: National Center for Missing & Exploited Children

Mothers Die Every Year at Birth?

By Dr. Mercola
Oct. 17, 2009

More than 2 million babies and mothers die worldwide each year from childbirth complications, outnumbering child deaths from malaria. The study also showed that such deaths could be easily avoided.

Some 1.02 million babies are stillborn and another 904,000 die soon after birth. By comparison, 820,000 children die from malaria worldwide. About 42 percent of the world’s 536,000 maternal deaths also occur during childbirth.

The report said that many of the deaths could be avoided with improvements in basic health care, and training for local health care workers to perform lifesaving techniques.
Sources:   AOL News October 8, 2009

It’s Time Home Schooling

By Apple 4 the Teacher
Oct. 12, 2009

It’s not boring as all get out.

I spent the first 5 and a half years of my education in public schools. There were, of course, times when I enjoyed learning things and talking to my friends. On the flip side, though, there were long stretches of monotony and boredom. And that was just grade school! I can’t even imagine what it would have gotten like in middle and high school.

I vaguely remember a class I took in 6th grade before I began to be homeschooled. “Conflict resolution” they called it. It was an entire class we had to sit through for 50 minutes a day on how not to get in a fight. Instead of teaching us something useful like math, history or science, we had to sit and learn that getting in a fistfight wasn’t good for anybody.

I think it goes without saying that homeschooling was far more interesting. I was either doing something and learning, or I was enjoying my free time. I never had to sit through extended periods of monotonous lectures or stare at a chalkboard while a teacher catered to the slowest student in the classroom. I was able to learn at my own pace and enjoy it.

 

No one gives you wedgies.

Unless, of course, you have an older sibling and then you might get more wedgies than you can handle. One of the fantastic things about being homeschooled is that there is no awkward social structure that you have to fit yourself into. Unless you live in a very complicated family, there are no bullies, no drug addicts and so forth.

Again, the advantage is more than what you don’t have to deal with, but also in what you do get. Being homeschooled enabled me to develop much stronger relationships with my parents and my siblings, and I did find a variety of friends through our homeschool group and church and so forth. I found that when I got to college I was able to comfortably communicate with everyone from the older students (some who were even grandparents, coming back for their education) to the younger students and even the professors and staff. None of these people ever gave me a wedgy.

 

Odds are your teacher will probably like you.

I didn’t personally ever have issues with a teacher that didn’t seem to like me or treat me well, but I do know that those experiences are out there. The odds increase, I think, as you get into high school that you might run into a teacher that you either don’t like or who doesn’t like you for some reason. I wouldn’t say that it’s anything personal, just sometimes there are personality clashes.

On the other hand, I think you benefit from home schooling because you’re able to develop a much deeper relationship with your parents. Instead of coming home from school and simply telling them what you did (if you can even remember all the details) you live it with them.

Source: Apples 4 the Teacher

 

Editor’s Note: Ever wonder why some students simply adore being homeschooled? Read why this former student thinks homeschooling rocked!

We would like to know what you think. dan@youngchronicle.com

Fun Learning Math

By Apple 4 the Teacher
Oct. 8, 2009

Are you tired of your dull and boring math assignments? Then you have come to the right place! This article is all about fun and effective activities to help you master your addition, subtraction, multiplication, and division. Make sure to ask your parents before using food and other household supplies that are recommended for these activities!

One of the best (and yummiest) ways to master your basic arithmetic is with food! Candy, crackers, or just about any other snack can be used to help you with your skills. Make sure the food is something you can separate into individual pieces, like crackers or skittles. You need pieces so you can add and subtract parts.

Ask your parents if you can get a treat from the store or the cupboard to help you with your math. Once you have access to food, you can get started. Using an actual item, like food, helps a lot of kids because you actually get to see the math that you are doing. It is not longer a random and abstract concept! You can even use your food to help you solve your math homework problems.

For example, if your assignment is a worksheet with word problems, use your food to help you compute the arithmetic. If the question asks you to add numbers together, take this number of your individual pieces of food and add them together.

If your parents won’t let you use food, there are many other items in your house that work just as well. Crayons, pencils, and paperclips are good alternatives because they are easy to move and around and you can use them for math without having to waste them.

Make sure that whatever you use is not something that you will not be able to reuse later. For example, it would not be a good idea to use tissues or toilet paper because you will just have to throw them away after solving your math. You would use crayons, pencils, or paper clips the same way that you would use food. Each item can be added together or separated apart to help you see the math you are doing.

Games are another great way to conquer your math! There are many games that involve math concepts. These include cards, dominoes, checkers, chess, and Yahtzee. Are you surprised that these games are listed as math helpers? Take a second to think about the skills that are needed to play these games. Cards and dominoes require an understanding of numbers, checkers and chess use logic which is closely tied to math, and Yahtzee requires players to add and multiple numbers!

This means the next time your parents nag you to study your math you can request to play a game with them (if they have a hard time with that, have them read this article and other math related articles located on this site). However, please understand that games and other activities that are listed in this article should not be considered replacements to homework and studying; therefore, you still have to finish your daily assignments and will have to do other more serious forms of studying part of the time.

There are also math games on the computer and the Internet that will help you understand the math skills that are plaguing you. Many kids’ sites have links to online math games. Be sure to check out ours in the resource directory! If you are having a lot of problems with your math class, then you might want to check out a more specialized math game.

Ask your parents about online tutoring. Online tutoring lessons combine fun math games with specialized instruction. This means you get to play fun games and get a lot of extra help with math class. Your parents can learn more about online tutoring by reading the articles on our site.

As you can see, there are more ways to learn math than just through math assignments! The next time you get bored or need a little more help figuring out your math assignment, try the tips and activities that were listed in this article. Hopefully they will be fun and effective for you.

Source: Apple 4 the Teacher

Editor’s Note: We would like to know what you think. Dan@youngchronicle.com

CPR for Children

By Melisa Coburn
Oct. 9, 2009

As moms, we spend tons of time, energy, and money obsessing about every detail of our kids’ safety. But here’s a basic you may not be on top of: Do you know how to perform CPR on your child in case of an emergency?

There are lifesaving techniques you need to know how to execute, correctly and quickly, if your child is choking, suffocating, drowning — or has stopped breathing for any other reason. Would you know what to do?

Print out our essential Emergency Guide to CPR for infants and older kids and put it on your fridge (it’s a printable PDF, complete with illustrations). Read and discuss it with your partner and your child’s caregiver.

Emergency Guide to CPR
Source: Parents

Editor’s Note: We would like to know what you think. dan@youngchronicle.com

Does Time Out Work?

By Bridget BooherOct. 1, 2009

 

The Value of Time-Outs

Biting. Hitting. Pinching. Out-of-control meltdowns. Ask any parent of a 2-year-old about the most dreaded — yet predictable — behaviors of the terrible twos and you’ll hear that litany. Within weeks of her second birthday, my own sweet-tempered child grabbed her friend by the hair, angrily slapped her father, and practiced her kicking technique on my shins.

“Two-year-olds have very powerful feelings that they are just starting to learn how to regulate,” says Marilou Hyson, Ph.D., associate executive director for professional development of the National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC), in Washington, D.C. “Parents need to help by setting limits and teaching through discipline, not harsh punishment.” That’s why this is the age when most parents introduce the ever-popular time-out.

Although the term has varying definitions (which many parents customize by creating a specific place or ritual for it), the general idea is to remove a child from his immediate surroundings in order to stop a negative behavior. For example, if your child clearly knows that she’s doing something wrong — throwing sand at a playmate, say — yet persists in doing it, a brief interval away from the sandbox lets her know that such behavior won’t be tolerated.

A time-out may also help a child calm down. If your son is running wild-throwing blocks or shoving his little brother — it’s necessary to intervene so he doesn’t hurt anyone (including himself) and can begin to regain control of his emotions.

As useful as it can be, however, time-outs don’t work in every situation. Here, some guidelines for deciding when it’s time for a time-out.

 

The Limits on Setting Limits

Lisa Campe could always tell when her daughter, Tess, was heading toward a rough spell. “There was no point in trying to talk rationally with her when she was upset,” says the Roslindale, Massachusetts, mother. Campe’s solution was to have Tess sit in her playroom for a brief cooling-off period.

In Campe’s case, a time-out did the trick. But how can you determine whether it’s the right response for your child? Parents should keep two factors in mind, Dr. Hyson advises.

First, realize that children this age are simply too young to make the connection between their own misbehavior and punitive discipline. That’s why any time-out, should you use it, must be brief. “Two-year-olds do not have long memories,” she says. “After just five minutes, they have completely forgotten the incident that prompted the time-out in the first place.”

The rule of thumb for a time-out is to give one minute for each year of age. Though two minutes may not seem like enough time for a child to absorb a lesson, it is long enough for a toddler. Besides, at this age, the point is less to instruct (2-year-olds are much too young to ponder the error of their ways) than to separate the child from the scene of the trouble.

Another point to remember is that using time-out as a punishment can be frightening for toddlers, especially if you’ve lost your temper. In addition to keeping your cool, make sure that you do not place the child in a physical setting where she will feel isolated or abandoned, even for just a couple of minutes.

Most important, a time-out should not be used as a way to punish a child in the throes of an out-of-control tantrum. “You’re trying to get a child to comply with something while he’s hysterical, and that just doesn’t work,” says Victoria Lavigne, Ph.D., an assistant professor of clinical psychiatry and behavioral sciences at Northwestern University Medical School, in Chicago. Instead, take him to a neutral place, but stay close by while he screams.

Even if a time-out is appropriate, you need to determine (as with any other discipline method) the cause of the negative behavior, not just a means of stopping it. Is your child having a rough time at day care? Is she coming down with a cold? Is she hungry? Is she picking up on tension between you and your partner or feeling the end-of-the-day, predinner rush?

Staying the Course

At some point, your attempts to set limits will almost certainly be met with tears. Even after you’ve patiently explained to your toddler why pulling on the lamp cord is a bad idea, he won’t grasp the concept right away. (As with almost everything else a 2-year-old does, repetition and practice are key.) If you decide to impose a time-out, accept that crying or even a tantrum might ensue and be prepared to ride it out.

Once the time-out is over, don’t mention the incident again. Instead, direct your toddler toward positive behavior — and give him lots of praise and encouragement for acting correctly.

Remember that there is no quick fix or easy solution to this very trying phase. “There’s an almost naive assumption among a lot of parents that if you discipline children, they won’t engage in that behavior again,” Dr. Lavigne says. “That rarely holds true at any age, but especially not for a 2-year-old.”

Copyright © 2004. Reprinted with permission from the October 2000 issue of Parents magazine.

 

Source: Parents

Editor’s Note: All content here, including advice from doctors and other health professionals, should be considered as opinion only. Always seek the direct advice of your own doctor in connection with any questions or issues you may have regarding your own health or the health of others.

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